♥*♥We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it. ♥*♥ ~*~John Lennon~*~ ♥*♥

Clinic offers gamers path back to reality

CHINA DAILY / World


Clinic offers gamers path back to reality
(China Daily)
Updated: 2006-07-14 06:14


Addiction expert Keith Bakker hopes the serenity of a 16th century townhouse on one of Amsterdam's canals will coax those snared in the fantasy world of online games back to reality.

The property, where sunlight warms the honey-coloured wood of the centuries-old floors, houses Europe's first clinic for people hooked on playing online games.

It is run by addiction consultants Smith & Jones, who felt there was a need for treatment even though experts are still debating whether excessive game playing is an addiction.

"We started seeing it about two years ago, people started coming in with gaming as sort of a secondary problem," Smith & Jones director Bakker, 45, said.

"Then, we got one kid in who was gaming 18 hours a day and I wanted to send him somewhere and we looked around and there was nothing, so we started looking into it," said Bakker, who struggled himself with drugs and alcohol in the past.

Smith & Jones began offering day programmes to help gamers, both those playing online and those hooked on video games.

"There are groups, however, that don't easily change or those that come in for a day programme and will tell you all the wonderful things you want to hear and go home and are online again," Bakker said.

Smith & Jones now offers in-patient programmes for a dozen people at a time, lasting four to six weeks.

Those checking in have often put their lives school, work, friends, personal hygiene on hold to keep playing, using anything from Red Bull to cocaine to stay alert.

Tim, 21, who has not played for a month since doing the day programme, said he hardly left his room for five years, gaining weight and using drugs.

Like many others he started out with a handheld GameBoy aged 12 but progressed to multiplayer online games that offer open-ended stories set in virtual universes that can support tens of thousands of players.

"I couldn't go to the toilet because then I would have to leave ... I would take an empty bottle and pee in it."

Keeping children quiet

Sometimes, parents are partly to blame for their children's behaviour, said Bakker, who was born in the United States.

"Often there are parents who are happy that the kid is on a game, at least it is quiet and off the streets," Bakker said.

"Or, they'll say 'why don't you go play, while mum and dad talk'."

The pull of games such as World of Warcraft, the sword and sorcery game EverQuest, racing game Gran Turismo or the 2006 FIFA World Cup game translates into a billion dollar industry.

The worldwide online games market is expected to grow to US$13 billion by 2011 from US$3.4 billion in 2005, according to market research firm DCF Intelligence.

Some 114 million people are expected to be playing online games by the end of 2006, the firm predicts.

Research suggests online game playing may trigger the release of the chemical dopamine in the brain. A study done in London's Hammersmith Hospital showed that increased levels of dopamine were roughly the equivalent of a dose of speed, an amphetamine that can be addictive.

The treatment offered by Bakker's firm is similar to that used to fight gambling or alcoholism. However, with gaming, the tricky part is the computer, which can hardly be avoided.

Treatment for excessive game playing is not covered by health care insurance, so patients have to cover the cost themselves 500 euros (US$640) a day.


(China Daily 07/14/2006 page6)

I was asked if suicide is selfish

it is selfish - when an individual commits suicide, he is doing what He wants to do, not what anyone else wants him to do... when an individual does what he wants instead of what others want, he is acting selfishly (and there is nothing wrong, at all, with acting selfishly).
Also, suicide is not cowardly. It's not an easy thing to do. It's not an easy choice to make, and it is even harder to carry out the act. Cowardly means taking the easy way out, but for most depressed people it is easier to just go on feeling depressed than to end it once and for all.
With all that said, I do not recommend suicide. Life is what you make of it, and just about anyone can make it into something they enjoy with some effort.
If you are considering suicide, please talk to people. Please talk to a suicide hotline. Please talk to as many people as you can, maybe someone will say something that helps you in some way. I think if you are going to do something as final as suicide, you don't have much to lose to go around and talk to a bunch of people about it. Sometimes talking to people can really change how you feel. Since it is a choice you can't reverse, you should be very careful making that choice, and should be absolutely certain you've talked to everyone who might make a difference, and be absolutely certain that you're making the correct choice. Contact me if you are still thinking about suicide. Thanks, hope this helps.
PS about 911 hijackers who committed suicide. The US media portrays them as cowards. They were not cowards. Do you have any idea how big your balls have to be to, with 3 other guys, take over a plane with over 100 people aboard with just box cuttes? Think about that! Wouldn't you be a little worried that maybe 20 of those people (or about 10% of the people on the plane) might come beat the crap out of you and throw you out of the plane? It took some guts just to do that.
It also took guts to purposefully fly the airplanes into things. If a US soldier fighting in Iraq is hunkered down in a foxhole, saying his final prayers because he is alone and there are 20 armed and angry Iraqis nearby shooting at him, our media would say he was brave and courageous if he started firing his machine gun at the enemy, trying to do as much damage as he could to the enemy before he died. Of course this is exactly the same thing the 911 hijackers were doing (damaging their enemy - the USA). For less than 20 men to kill ~3,000 of their enemies, and to do hundreds of billions of dollars worth of damage is just incredible. From their viewpoint, the people they killed weren't innocent - the victims of 911 paid plenty in taxes which funded the US war machine. There is an old saying, "all's fair in love and war" which is essentially true, but there are always those on both sides who cry about the other side not playing fair.
Anyway, as per my statements above, suicide is a courageous and selfish act, and it was in the case of the 911 hijackers, also. I am not saying what they did was right. I'm not saying suicide is right, either. You see, to steal something takes courage (and selfishness). You can't rob a bank without courage. You can't do many things (whether they are good or bad) without courage. And just because you are courageous in an act, doesn't mean that act is right or good. It's not really necessary to call 911 hijackers cowards - they weren't cowards - it's not necessary to deceive ourselves about that.

Finished first week of new job

As you probably don't know, I got a job with American Greetings (a rather large greeting card company). My job is to go to the stores with my boss and other crew members to install new display fixtures and to remove the old ones.

I like the job; it's very easy, I get to hang out with various people and even get to be outside in the sun sometimes, which is one of my favorite summer time things.

Of course, I find some of the people I work with pretty annoying. Like most people, they aren't very smart, and it can get frustrating dealing with them, and annoying listening to them. But oh well, such is life.

My boss is very nice, and pretty generous. I mean we (his crewmembers) don't get paid very much but he usually pads our hours so we get a little more than the company would like. He's also just a hell of a nice guy, understanding and very friendly. I'm glad to know Dan! I'm also glad I know Laurie, who has been there longer than anyone other than Dan (like 5 years). She's really nice, too, and although she is a Christian, she's not the pushy, judgmental kind. I guess I work for her more than with her, I think she is kind of an assistant to Dan (which Alex says I might be able to be if I stick with this job, since I'm smart and most people Dan employs aren't very).

So far we've gone to Cleveland, Columbus, Wooster, Wadsworth, and some of the suburbs of Cleveland to remove, install and repair fixtures. Usually there are some pretty girls working with me; their job is to fill the fixtures/displays up with cards. I have fun talking and mildly flirting with them at times, which is good since I'm still struggling to get over my ex girlfriend (aka the love of my life).

It's nothing special, but it's a job. Best job I've had in years!

NAILS IN THE FENCE

I found this on another blog, and stole it.

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.
The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.
The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there. "
A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us.
Please forgive me if I have ever left a hole.

For My Friends Who Are In Love....

(I copied this from someone else because I like it)

For My Friends Who Are In Love....

To all my friends; Be sure to read this, it may help many of you... you will even enjoy and learn from it.
To all my friends who are.....SINGLE
Love is like a butterfly the more you chase it the more it eludes you,but if you just let it fly it will come to you when you least expect it.
Love can make you happy but often it hurts but love is only special when you give it to someone who really worth it.
So take your time and choose the best.

To my friends who are.....NOT SINGLE
Love isn't becoming somebody else's "perfect person"
It's about finding someone who helps you become the best person you can be.

To my friends who are....ENGAGED
The measure of compatibility is not the years spent together
But how good you are to each other

To my friends who are.....MARRIED
Love is not about "it's your fault" but "i'm sorry"
Not where are you but i'm right here for you
Not how could you but i understand
Not i wish you were but i'm thankful you are

To my friends who are.... HEARTBROKEN
Hearbreaks last as long as you want and cut as deep as you allow them to go
The challenge is not how to survive heart breaks but to learn from them

To my friends who are..... NAIVE
How to be in love:
Be consistent but not persistent share and never be unfair understand and try not to demand and get hurt but never keep the grudge

To my friends who are..... Possessive
It breaks your heart to see the one you love Happy with someone else
But it's more painful to know that the one you love Is unhappy with you

To my friends who are.....AFRAID TO CONFESS
Love hurts when you break up with someone
It hurts even when someone breakup with you
But love hurts the most: When the person you love has no idea how you feel about him/her

To my friends who are.....STILL HOLDING ON
A sad thing about life is when you meet someone and fall in love,
only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be,
and that you have wasted years on someone who wasn't worth it.
If the person isn't worth it now, it's not going to be worth it a year or 10 years from now.

To All My Friends...........
My wish for you is a man/women whose love is: honest strong mature never changing protective encouraging rewarding and unselfish....

小百合 blowing kissess to......
you my love carried ever so gently 　　　
on the wings of dove i wish we were nearer though alas....
we are not but we will forever be one right here in my heart....
forget me not 小百合

I will always Love you
i don't need a special dayto express what my heart has to say
for cupid did not pierce my heart
you stole right from the start
if i don't express what i feel inside
then my day starts without sunrise
for everyday with you starts with a kiss
and i love you
for love is more than those three words
for our hearts to be heard
for those words cannot convey
what my heart has to say
so i will let my actions speak
each and everyday of the week
i don't need any gifts from you
to show that your love is true
all that i really want is to spend time
for your kissess are sweeter than wine...
i love you!!!!

Notification to public of my intent to blog again

I didn't blog for a long time because all I ever did was play World of Warcraft 24/7 since March 2005 til March or maybe even April 2006.

Warcraft is a very well designed game, and if a person has an escapist personality (or an addictive personality) they can spend lots of time playing it.

I am glad I am no longer playing wow, but now my life is really screwed up and I have to become a very busy person (like most people already are) in order to improve it and to get the things I want in life. That is, real things, not imaginary things in a video game. I was "very busy" in the world of warcraft, and I did acquire many, many things, but unfortunately they were imaginary things, that make no difference in the long term in this real world. I know from my succcess in the world of warcraft that I can succeed in the real world, since I am smart.

Since I am going to be busy with Real Life things, I will be blogging to keep people up to date with what I'm doing.

To my dearest who has left me

I want you to know that there is no woman I would ever have left you for.